Thoughts from Dr. Joe
All week I had a strange feeling…like something was about to happen. I hadn’t felt that way since my days of debauchery hanging out in Lucy’s Tiger Den in Bangkok, Thailand. I was younger then and was both foolish and fearless of heart, often an infliction of youth.
For the past few days I noticed an unusual scurry of activity and conversation between Kaitzer and Simone. Something was in the wind; I could smell it! When I had such sensations in the jungles of Southeast Asia something always happened!
While sitting at dinner, Kaitzer remarked, “Can you take Simone to the dance at on Thursday?”
I had forgotten!
“What dance,” I inquired. I thought if I played dumb, which is not hard for me to do, the nightmare of Simone going to a dance might go away. In her calm manner Kaitzer assured me that there was indeed a dance, and it would be Simone’s first.
Although I was stunned and my face had turned ashen white, I was still able to think logically. “Are there going to be boys there,” I asked? Simone and Kaitzer rolled their eyes and gave me that deadpan look. I’ve seen that before! By their absence of reply I realized there would be.
I was not ready for this. Society hastens children to grow-up and assume adult roles before they are cognitively and emotionally ready to cope with the mysteries and inclinations of the opposite sex. Girls who delay the roles of young adulthood while holding on to the manifestations of children are better adjusted and in turn more capable of assuming the inevitability of maturation.
I know it’s just a dance and my reaction is over the top, but I’m old school. I fight things hard! Some of us just want our daughters to stay little girls. The progression of life will eventually overwhelm me, and Epilates will appear in the end. But I will not go easy.
Let me get off my soapbox and get back to the story of Simone’s first dance.
The moment of reckoning came sooner than later. “Let’s go daddy; I’m ready,” she said. Simone looked prettier than a picture and I was glad she had little resemblance to me. En route I gave her more admonitions than Yahweh gave to the Israelites at Mount Sinai. Simone politely listened and smiled and intuitively I felt that was my cue to be silent. I thought, “To make a person trustworthy one must trust them.”
There was nothing else I could say; I presume all those mother-daughter talks throughout the years would carry her through her first dance. Words are a powerful weapon; but example is omnipotent. I knew she would be fine but I wished I had imparted some of my martial skills.
We arrived in the round and Simone said, “I’ll get off here dad.” Her request carried a heavy message and although it hit me like a ton of bricks, I realized that growing up is discovering the core of strength within you. By her statement, I realized she had found her strength and that my utility had run its course.
With two hours to kill I headed to Starbucks for a cup of black tea, and found solace in Marcus Aurelius’ classic, “Meditations.”
I’ve read “Meditations” many times, but now it spoke to me. Life is serendipitous and gives us exactly what we need when we need it. Marcus Aurelius, the Philosopher, Warrior King tells us that an encompassing life lives peacefully in accordance with the natural order of nature. When virtue dominates the soul one creates harmony with the natural progression of life.
The great king had spoken, and in accordance to the laws of nature, Simone will not remain a little girl and will indeed go to a first dance.
I finished my tea, put my book down and headed back to the round to pick-up Simone.
Life’s a dance and you earn as you go!